Early in life, let’s say eight, nine and ten years old, we start comparing ourselves with others. We gravitate toward kids have similar interests with. We compare ourselves by hair, skin, height, weight, and even then most kids become friends easily because isn’t much depth in those relationships, purely fun and play.
Early in the teen years, let’s say thirteen, fourteen and fifteen, we start to decide who we are in relation to everyone else. We compare ourselves, our talents, our looks, our clothes, our friends, our homes, and our parents. Often, how we see ourselves is not reality, it is our own perception of ourselves. It is important that we take a true self-inventory. A true self-inventory is to be truthful to yourself which is very difficult as many traits are hard to recognize in yourself. There are a few key traits that you need to evaluate and expand on in high school.
Communication Skills,
Finding your talents and traits
Expanding your interests
Choosing your attitude
COMMUNICATION
The key trait that is important in life to be successful in any area, sports, school, college, work, friendships,…is Communication! Some teens are natural communicators, meaning you can express yourself, your feelings, your concerns, your questions. Others have to work hard to communicate. They struggle with asking questions, or don’t even know what questions to ask. While others don’t even feel the need to communicate, or don’t feel comfortable trying. Everyone can improve communication.
TALENTS & TRAITS
Recognizing your talents is an important part of self-inventory. Some talents may be very obvious to list. You are a talented musician, singer, artist, soccer player or cook. You may not even be aware how talented you are in other areas. Are you a good writer, or good with technology? **Are you good at speaking to people, groups, adults and peers? This is difficult to most, as many people work on their communication skills for years! **Do you make people feel comfortable around you? Can you sense if others are uncomfortable, scared or afraid, then you are very sensitive to others, which is a valuable trait. **Can you persuade others and lead others? Do people listen when you talk? Then you have valuable leadership skills that can be developed further. **Are you accepting of others and not judgmental? As you grow older and are exposed to different groups of people, you will notice the world is made of different cultures, people, families and recognizing differences and learning from them is crucial in preparing to work in today’s workforce today.
INTERESTS
At this age, you may have clear interests, music, sports, computers, etc..but remember you are still learning and developing at an alarming rate. When asked some students may say “I Dunno” when asked what they are interested in. It is important to understand to be open to new interests. We often shy away from trying new things because we don’t know about them. You won’t know if you like something if you don’t try it! Everyone you meet, every place you visit, every experience you have is an opportunity to learn about yourself and new interests. Always be open to learning about the others, the world, and yourself.
How can you expand your interests in high school? Join a club. Most schools offer service and honors clubs and many interest clubs, Honors clubs are usually by application only and require certain academics. Service clubs are centered around volunteering in the community, reading books, painting houses, gathering supplies for the needy. Interest clubs are more focused on a specific activity, like Scuba, Environmental, Paintball, Fishing, etc.. Both Service and Interest clubs give you an opportunity to join a new group, meet new friends and experience new adventures. One experience leads to another and another. Getting involved in clubs allow you to be more ‘dimensional’, ‘diverse’ and a just plain interesting. When I say that to students, they always say “huh?” Right now you are a blank piece of paper, and at the end of high school you don’t want to be blank – so in order to fill the paper, you must try and do new things, so you can fill up that paper. Trying new things in high school, such as clubs and elective classes, will help you make decisions about yourself. “I hated that” I really liked that, maybe I can do more next year” .
ATTITUDE
Attitude is everything. Choose to have a positive attitude. OK I’ll say that again because its that important….. CHOOSE to have a POSITIVE attitude. I sometimes have to say that to myself aloud. “OK, self, think positive about this!” It can change my mood and emotions about a situation. See things for its possibilities. and yes I know its hard in high school to do that because we are surrounded by judgmental as#%&%^s!
Have a positive attitude about yourself. Many teens are so critical about themselves; their looks, their abilities. The little voice inside your head is very powerful, it can effect your mood and attitude. Instead of saying “I’m horrible at this”, maybe say “next time I’ll try it another way” .Self respect is about taking pride in yourself, not just for how you look, but in everything you do and want to do. When you respect yourself you acknowledge that you are valuable.
A positive attitude starts with self-respect. One example of self-respect is when you make decision about your own behavior on a daily basis. You will see friends make decisions to drink, try drugs, or just behave badly. You will have to decide what is acceptable for you. You set your limits and make choices based on the respect you have for yourself. When young people have self-respect they are in control of their own bodies and make responsible choices for themselves no matter what their peers are doing. This is difficult to do in the teens years. It takes strength and confidence, but afterwards it builds confidence and pride in yourself, which takes time to evolve, so be patience with yourself.